the tale of a polar bear and a chickidee
by marshmallowgilbird
Summary: gilbert is an ass, canada is cute, and france is a pervert. horrible at summerys just READ! btw, rateing MIGHT go up, if enough people mention it...
1. I am Gay

**i do not own hetalia. if i did would i be here? NO! i i did, id be chilling with the BTT on a yacht eatin' cupcakes and singin' songs. = 3**

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Ludwig could see and hear his brother and their band from his room were currently doing a cover of the irresponsible older brothers favorite song I'm gay by bowling for soup. Ludwig just found it ironic. to the extent of his knowledge, they were all strait. frighteningly so. they weren't labeled the bad touch trio for nothing.

don't hate us cuz were happy

don't hate us cuz were beautiful

don't hate us cuz we make you smile

or if we go the extra mile

to make someone feel better on a really shitty day

if your hearing what I'm saying then i want you to say "I'm gay"

all of a sudden the music stopped.

"dude that was so fucking awesome!" he heard his brother shout

"oui, il était très ... intéressant" replied Francis the residential pervert of the group replied

"English or German frenchie" his dimwitted older brother stated, hands on hips.

" your real classy mi amigo"their Spanish friend said, "... and you stand like a senorita"

"shut up dumkof" he replied letting his hands fall to his sides, "at least i don't cook like a girl" he taunted his friend. Ludwig could already tell you what was going to happen,not that you'd ask. people always found him he pondered this a curious sight played out below.

_3linebreak3_

(Prussia's POV)

" your real classy mi amigo" Antonio commented, "... and you stand like a senorita"

"shut up dumkof" _'i don't stand like a girl'_ "at least i don't cook like a girl" i take a jab at Francis.

"comme une fille! vous ignoriez putain homme allemand!" he all but jumped at me.

suddenly there's a gasp behind me. the Frenches eyes widened considerably.

"matteiu!"

"bonjour cousin Francis" i heard a squeak behind me. Francis pushed me over and i fell on my but _' that was so not awsome'_ i thought to myself.

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**TRANSLATIONS!  
**

**oui, il était très ... intéressant- yes, it was very... interesting**

**mi amigo- my friend  
**

**senorita- teenage girl  
**

**dumkof- idiot  
**

**comme une fille! vous ignoriez putain homme allemand!- like a girl! you ignorant German fuck!**

**bonjour- hello  
**

**BTW I SPEAK AMERICAN AND GOOGLE TRANSLATE!  
**

**IF I GET MORE THAN THREE PEOPLE TO COMMENT I WILL DO CHAPTERS TWICE AS LONG. I JUST DIDN'T WANT TO WRIGHT A LONG CHAPTER IF NO ONE WOULD READ IT.  
**

**CUPCAKE!  
**


	2. Losing Kuma

**i do not own hetalia, if i did prussia would live in MY basement. MWA HAHAHA**

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** (Matthiew's POV)**

comme une fille! vous ignoriez putain homme allemand!" _~oh my goodness~_ i thought to myself. i saw francis's eyes widen in disbelif.

"matteiu!"

"bonjour cousin Francis" i say quietly. in a rush francis is in front of me and has enveloped me in a hug.

"matthieu! i thought you wernt going to come until next monday, did you lie to papa?" he asks smileing.

" s-sorry i didnt call, alfred and i got an earlier f-flight"i say as i hear

"did he just say papa?" behind us in a didtincly spanish voice.

" oh..." francis says slightly disaponted, finnaly letting me go from the extreamly akward,at least on my part, hug.

" i dont know where alfred is though..." i say feeling on the spot. suddenly i hear my very obnoctious brother.

"MATTIE!" as im suddenly tackled. " WHERED YOU GO! I WASS SOOOOOO WORRIED!"

" st-stop yeling al" i studder out.

" oh, sorry" he says and laughs still spralled out crushing me.

" get off him you git!" i hear an extereamly fimilar voice call out, "your fat ass will crush the poor lad"

"IGGY?!"he yells scrambleing to his feet. i lay there for a while haveing an out of body expereance.

"kuma?" i say as i see white hair.

"no, my name is gilbert, the totaly awesome lead singer."the person says leaning over me and holds out his hand to pull me.

"oh, than do you know where kuma is?" finally on my feet.

"uh, no, whos kuma?"

my polar bear, iseem to have lost him when i was walking." i say looking around.

"a... polar bear?" he says sounding confused

"yep, now if youll excuse me..." i say still looking around " i have to find him.

" how bout i help you look? the totaly awesome bme could really help with that" he says with a cocky smirk.

"ok.." i say and smile a little bit" lets go then"

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** (Gilbert's POV)**

i lean over the very disorented boy

"kuma?" he says and opens his eyes.~_woah hes beautiful, thoes eyes look so sad though~_

"no, my name is gilbert, the totaly awesome lead singer."i say and stick my hand out.~_his hands are so soft~_

"oh, than do you know where kuma is?" he asks me stareing into my eyes.

"uh, no, whos kuma?" i say

my polar bear, iseem to have lost him when i was walking." he says looking around.~_did he just say poar bear?~_

"a... polar bear?" i say

"yep, now if youll excuse me..." ~_hes gunna leave~ _i thought woried " i have to find him."~_think fast!~_

" how bout i help you look? the totaly awesome me could really help with that" i say and smile.~_good job~_

"ok.." he says and smiles a little bit" lets go then" _~ i think i just had a minor heart attach~_

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**ok thank you for reviewing! i went and looked at my computer and screamed. i scared the crap out of the people i lived with though...its ok, it was worth seeing their faces. i know i said the chapters would be longer but i have a harder time wrighting longer ones. ill just have to update all the time with new chapters...**

**CUPCAKE!**


	3. Ivan gets his FIRST death threat

** OK I DONT OWN HETALIA, IF I DID, FELI WOULD BE FEEDING ME ICE CREAM WHILE LOVI WASHED A CAR OUTSIDE WITH ME WATCHING. IM SORRY FOR THE LONG WAIT, THIS WEEK WAS "SPRIT WEEK" AT THE SCHOOL I ATTEND. =P **

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** (GILBERT'S POV)**

"so... where do we start looking?" I say

" i think we should start at the park," he said looking around," he likes to climb trees." he said starting forward.

"that's great, but the park is that way."I say with a smirk. he blushed scarlet. ~_damn hes cute~_ I think watching, ~_that settles it~._

_" _oops, I have the worst sence of direction.." he said looking down, nervously tucking a piece of golden hair behind his ear.

"its ok," i smiling, "beautiful people can always ask for direction" I say as he blushes a more cute shade of cherry red. " so we should get going, ja?" he nods, and i pull the best move in the history of man kind. "we should hold hands,... so you don't get lost of course." I say slyly.

"um...o-ok" he stutters putting his hand out tentatively.

"ja," i say after a beat,"let's go find the bear"

** (MATTIE"S POV)**

"Birdie?"I hear next to me.

"did you just call me birdie?"I asked surprized.

"ja, und I notice you have barely stuttered since we left. why is that?"

"I..."_ ~thats weird~ _"...well I don't know. i stutter when im nervous or uncomfortable, the only people I don't stutter around are Alfred and Ivan"~_damn it, why did i mention him?~ _I can feel the tears but am able to blink them back.

"vho is Ivan?" he asks looking worried for some reason.

" well, he is my best and only friend.." I say looking down._~ don't cry damn it ~_ i cant stop it now that it's started.

"Birdie! are you ok?" he said turning to fully face me, stopping us in the middle of the side-walk.

** (GILBERT'S POV)**

_i will kill that bastard for making MY Mattie cry~_ watching the beautiful face fill with sorrow over someone I don't know.

"it will be ok birdie"i say enveloping him in a hug. he clings to me like a life line. so I bring him over to a bench by the side of the road.

**(oh great mystical time-lapse thingie named fred!)(1 hour)**

he fell asleep. ~_he looks so cute sleeping~ _i think,_~i know! ill call his brother to find the bear, and take him home~._ i carefully take out my phone, making sure not to wake the boy leaning against me. "yo! whats up?" i hear yelled from the phone.

"is this Alfred?" i ask unsure.

" the one and only broski!" he says obnoxiously. i just roll my eyes.

"it is the awesome Gilbert, can you od me a favor and look for Mattie's bear? he fell asleep and im going to take him home. thanks " I say without waiting for an answer,hang up, and carefully lift the sleeping angel in my arms.

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**review and stuff peeps! please? it makes my day when you review. i can even be like "hey i like pizza" i would be happy. also tell me if you really want somthing to happen.i love you all!**

**CUPCAKE!**


	4. comfort and a strange place

**SORRY ABOUT THE LATENESS. MY COMPUTER DECIDED TO RUIN MY LIFE... DAMN YOU DEMITRI! (MY COMPUTERS NAME) OTHER THAN THAT? NOTHING HAPPENED. PLEASE COMMENT...**

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** (MATT's POV)**

_~what happened?~_ i thought opening my eyes. ~_where the hell am I?~ _sitting up I realize im not in my room.

" so your up? that's great" I hear from the door.

~_holy shit... there's a yummy man, standing in the door way.~ _Gilbert stood there, water dripping down his chiseled chest. the sunlight gleaned off his beautiful body.~_is my nose_ bleeding?~

"are you ok birdie?" he said coming to sit on the bed looking concerned " you nose id bleeding"he lifted his hand to my face

_~god danmit im suck a dork~_I say wiping my nose. "im f-fine" I say blushing. "where am I though?"

"at my awesome house" he replied dead pan.

"um why?" I ask sitting up a bit straiter.

" well you started crying and you fell asleep so i brought you here."_ ~oh no, no no no no no. i did not cry in front of him!~_

"so who's ivan?"

"someone that was once verry close to me" i said dropping my eyes. suddenly i was pulled against someone.

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** (GILBERTS POV)**

"someone that was once verry close to me" he said dropping his eyes.

_~go for it!~_ i thought pulling him against my chest. "if he makes you cry, hes not good enough for you" i said still angry about last night.

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**SORRY ITS SO SHORT. I JUST HAVE A LACK OF INSPIRATIOIN. WHAT IS THE MEANING OF LIFE? YOU WILL GET A VIRTUAL ...**

**CUPCAKE!**


	5. enter the protective older brother

**hello i have not died. please review, it means alot to me to hear what you think,(even if you think its not worth it)**

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** (matt's POV)**

suddenly I can feel my head being tipped up.

"please don't cry anymore birdie" Gilbert says, his eyes holding a seriousness I have never seen. his lips brush against mine. the idiot-sorry I mean Alfred burst through the door.

"MATTIE! I woke up and realized you werent there to make me breakfast!" he yelled, completely oblivious to the moment he had just ruined.

"wait, what are you doing to my brother Gilbert?" he said looking angry

"uh-oh" this could get very bad "al, its ok, he was just... comforting me" I say as he walks over to us. suddenly im picked up and thrown over al's shoulder. "AL!" I (whisper)yell in outrage.

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** (gil's pov)**

Alfred's eyes are filled with something dark. "keep your dirty hands off of my brother" he turns and leaves not giving me a moment to respond

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**(back to matt)**

" Alfred Freedom Jones, you put me down right this minute or so help me god I will burn all of your captain america comics." I said feigning calm.

"but matt~" he whined

"NOW" I said. once my feet were on the ground i confronted him. "what the hell was that all about!" his face got hard

" I wont let him hurt you matt" he said.

"grow up Alfred!" I said, suddenly really mad "get over your self! I am fine on my own" i say running away from him. ~_i need some time to think~_


	6. The pain of the past: part one

**SO IM SORRY I HAVENT UPDATED RECENTLY. MY LIFE HAS BEEN... WEIRD. YOU KNOW THAT GOING FROM HAVEING NO PEOPLE YOU CAN CONCIDER FRIENDS TO HAVING A GROUP OF PEOPLE THAT CARE, ITS KINDA A MIND TRIP. I FEEL LIKE A DOUCHE. SORRY PLEASE COMMENT, IT MAKES ME SCREAM LIKE A LITTLE GIRL AND DO A SPIT TAKE, ITS GREAT. SO AS I HAVE MENTIONED BEFORE I DONT OWN HETALIA. IF I DID RUSSIA WOULD BE UNDERSTOOD, AND BELIRUS WOULD RELIZE THAT LITHUANIA WAS PERFECT FOR HER. ****_Warrnig, this chapter pulls into the dark past that matt is hideing from everyone. includes self harm, attempted suicide, abuse and lots of feels. and yes i genderbent belerus._**

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** (MATT'S POV)**

The cold whipped at Matthews face. the fridged whether pulling memories from deep within the dark, broken places of his heart.

_~Flashback~_

Matthew stared out the window of his apartment in the afternoon. _~damn its going to be cold~ _the weather of russia, as always, was not favorable, even in the summer time. Matthew had been on his cultural exchange for two months already, with only one month to go he had things under even did as his father had told him to do and found a boyfriend(his father ment well when he said girlfriend)the intimidating russian, in Matthews eyes, was also compassionate and caring. innocent Matthew decided he'd go and look for Ivan so they could spend the day together as they normally house where Ivan lived was a block away so Matthew decided he would he got the re the door was unlocked. "Ivan?" he asked timidly "are you here?"

"so you're the one older brother has been seeing, im Nickoli by the way" a voice said from the entrance way said walking up to Matthew, smirking. "stay away, he is mine" matt was shocked to say in the least.

"y-you cannot tell me w-what to do"matt said getting a nervous flutter in his stomach as Nickoli stept closer his gaze narrowing menicingly."there is no use in being stubborn тупые американские i WILL get what i want" just then the sound of Ivan coming down he stairs could be heard and quick as lightning Nickoli pulled the Canadian into a fiercely tight embrace. "he will forgive me but will he forgive you?" he whispered leaning in to place a forceful kiss against matts surprized lips.

"... what are you doing mattvey?" russia said a deadly purple aura rolling off him in waves.

"i-, you-, he-" the Canadian was very confused.

"big brother? I was just talking to him when he suddenly started to kiss me" fake tears were welling up I Nickoli's eyes. Ivans eyes turned to matthew.

" get out" he said, fake calm dripping from his heavily accented english. Matthew left, not knowing what else to do feeling hurt that Ivan didnt belive him. he could feel the dark habits from his past making their way to the surface as he neared the appartement.

**GRAFFIC**

he slowly closed the door, and checked the locks three times out of habit, making his way to gather all the things he would need.

~_hydrogen peroxide_

_guise_

_burn ointment_

_needle_

_thread_

_knife~_

the mental checklist was gruesome and he laid everything out ont the counter paying close attention to detail. and turned ont he stove to high, placing an empty pot on the the metal heated up he hummed the canadian national the knife and pressing it as hard as he could, and dragged it across his forearm. he repeated it five more times makeing deep gashes across his arm. the blood drippid onto the floor, staining the white tile red for the first time. by this point the pan was red hot. so he picked it up, looked at it the pressed it firmly against his skin caurturizing the wounds. it broght to mind his favorite poem.

THAT REDISH BLAZE

lost in the place i know best,

looking for some place to rest.

frozen in this state of fear,

looking for a friend thats near.

finding no one, i want to scream,

finding emotions i need to ream.

so confused,

emotionaly abused,

ahhhhhhhhh...

sweet releaf has caught my gaze,

hidden in a redish blaze.

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**OK SO THIS IS PART ONE. THE NEXT CHAPTER IS ALSO ABOUT THIS INCEDENT, OK SO REVIEW, TELL ME WHAT IS DID RIGHT/WRONG AND...**

**CUPCAKE!**


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